Where life's contradictions get comfortable

The other day my lad was talking to me about his mates starting university and said that sometimes, when people finish, bear in mind they haven’t started yet. That some go on sabbatical for a year or eighteen months. So it has got me thinking. Can I go on a sabbatical? Can I just check out of life for a bit? Sod off around the world, travelling in my van- can you have a sabbatical from your family? Is that even a thing? I looked up a sabbatical definition, and it said that it

Do you ever get up in the morning and think, why am I so angry? Today is going to be one of those days where nothing is right, everything is wrong, and the stupidest of things are going to irritate you beyond belief for no apparent reason. Why this happens, I really don’t know. I would love to know, more than anything, to be able to stop it from happening. I reckon if you could write a how-to guide that actually stopped this, you would make a killing. Not a twelve-step guide

Am I wrong? A random rant about what seemingly is an innocent invitation but is also so much more. So I have been invited to a birthday party, which is really nice and thoughtful, until you realise who invited me…

Do you ever get those days when you wake up and, without even realising, everyone is getting it? You get in the car, or in my case the van and all of a sudden you develop a lead foot. Normally you drive really carefully, watch your speed and drive like the little old lady that you quite often feel like when you first get up. Well, how you imagine you would drive if you were a little old lady because in reality, those grey-haired ladies are something else entirely. They are fa

When we first got together, he would randomly buy me flowers. He would come home from work with a small bouquet, give me a kiss and say, Hi, how’s your day been? That’s it, nothing more. Do you know how much this can freak a girl out (it shouldn’t, but it did). I took the flowers with one eyebrow raised, thinking, what's happened? What has he done? What’s the catch? There is always a catch. I can’t question him, because then I will just come across as a weirdo, so I find the

When I think about it, I have achieved a fair few personal goals. Goal: To buy my first house. A tarantula embodying the mysterious allure when spiders connect with the depths of your soul. I always said that I wanted to buy my first house before I was thirty. I achieved this when I was twenty-nine without even meaning to. You will see this is a recurring theme in my life. So I had been saving money for a deposit for years and had gotten a decent amount saved, but still felt

So today was an epic fail. Got up this morning in an amazing mood, had a right laugh at 6 am, went to work and then within an hour and a half I had had a fag, I was on day 47. The worst part is that I didn't even have it because I really craved one; it was the habit that I craved. I craved the escape smoking gives you when you take yourself out of a situation to settle your inner rage. Gutted. I have been using the Nicorette inhalers because I really don’t like chewing gum or

Firstly, a bit about me I'm forty, constantly overthinking life and apparently incapable of sitting still. I've raised two amazing children, become a granny, paid off my mortgage, quit smoking, survived more than I'd ever expected to and somehow still wake up wondering what the hell I'm doing. Finding strength and nourishment in the beauty of the present moment. This isn't a self-help website. I'm not a therapist. I'm just someone trying to make sense of life after spending t