Meeting the kids on the rainiest day of the year
When the weather changes your plans for the better. Not dramatically. Just enough to make you realise how much life can be negotiated with clouds and laughter.
Bo and I had been together for quite a while before he met the kids, and after many conversations, we still couldn’t decide the best way to introduce him, so we decided not to. When they got up in the morning, he was at the cooker making bacon sandwiches for
breakfast. My lad came down first, stopped dead in his tracks, made eye contact with this strange bearded man, looked at me and ran straight back up the stairs. A few minutes later, you hear little feet creeping down the stairs, and my daughter sticks her head around the door, looks at me, then looks at him and says, “Hi.”
Bo replies, “Hi, do you want tomato sauce on your bacon sandwich?”
Looking confused whispers, “Yes”
“Does your brother?”
Alexander sticks his head round the door. “Yes, please”
And that was that.
One of our first outings with the kids was supposed to be to Go Ape, but it rained so we didn’t go, and I mean rained; it was torrential out there. So, me being me, decided, " Let's go for a walk.”
He looked at me like I had lost my mind as we were all piling into the car. We went to one of the kids' favourite places where they could run about and play whatever their imagination allowed. The nature reserve had woodlands, bluebells, marshes, a reservoir and muddy tracks; what more could kids want? Clearly, he had never walked in the rain before; this was going to be funny.
The kids jumped out of the car and ran straight over to the hedge to look for their walking sticks. Basically, an old, tall stick that can be passed off as Gandalf’s walking stick. We found them a couple of months ago; we stash them in the hedge every time we leave, ready for the next visit. Bo pulls his coat tighter against the pouring rain, and we set off for a walk through the woods. It got to the point where we couldn’t get any wetter if we tried; we were soaked to the bone. Then I spotted an amazing opportunity; I ran to the biggest puddle and kicked it straight at the kids. Bo was horrified, the kids stood stock still in shock, I laughed, and then it registered. Water dripped from everywhere; next thing you know, we are all jumping in puddles and a big water fight commenced. We crossed a small bridge, and on the other side was the puddle of all puddles.
I announced very loudly, “Not this one.”
The kids had been before, so knew why to avoid this particular puddle however, Bo hadn’t, he thought I was just being mardy so as he got up to the puddle with the side of his foot kicked the puddle with all his effort straight at me. Now it was our turn to be horrified. What he hadn’t realised was this wasn’t just any puddle; it was just sludge, the muddiest place of the whole 230-acre reserve and he had just kicked it straight up the front of me. I had a trail of mud from my toes all the way up to my head and beyond; it was in my mouth, up my nose, everywhere.
Following his shocked gasp, I choked, “Why?”
He had no words; the kids were unsure of what to do, of how this was going to play out. Bo was looking at me with sheer shock on his face, ready to apologise sincerely and begin grovelling. I look at his face and laugh; the minute I start to laugh, the kids are hysterical, proper belly laughing. Bo is apologising between sniggers; I wipe the mud from my eyes, laughing whilst contemplating whether to kick the muddy puddle back at him. They must have seen that look in my eye, my face must have changed because right then everyone ran, so I didn’t get the chance.
By the time we had got back to the car, we were filthy, with no towels to cover the seats nor a change of clothes, we had to strip off down to our underwear at the side of the road to get in the car. Not what any of us expected to be doing when meeting the kids on the rainiest day of the year. At this, the kids warned him, “Get out while you can before you get stuck.”
Well, we are all pleased to say he is still stuck.
If you enjoyed this, you might want to read:
Or come and sit on the Sofa once a week.
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